Remembering the Good, in the Goodbyes.

Home is my happy place. 

Gone are the days of longing for a vacation away from Home. Now, coming back home is a vacation in itself. The otherwise constant cribbing about so much to do and so little time meets with a momentarily halt and benediction comes in the form where there is “nothing to do and all day to do it”.

Almost 10 days into, what I would call the longest vacation of my college life (EIGHTY MIGHTY DAYS), I wish to reconcile with my productivity.

Marking my beginning with a blog post.

It took a while to come out of the trauma that the Eight Semester had in store.The occurrence of events prior to the foregone conclusion were nothing short of exhilarating but their culmination was predictably devastating. 

Sometimes, home isn’t a just a place surrounded with walls, it is a feeling that comes with people around you. Finding home in a hopeless place (Read College) was certainly baffling but the obscurity faded as familiarity with the faces flourished. After a prolonged period of four years, letting go definitely doesn’t come with ease. But it was time to say good-bye to my seniors.

Coming to terms with the appalling reality seemed repugnant amidst the consecutive goodbyes. The exercise was uphill taxing: one moment you are waving a teary eyed farewell and the next moment you are writing an examination paper. The plodding three-hour operation that is anyways quite tedious seemed all the more disconcerting.

The process of abandonment is always incapacitating.  It impairs you because with people leaving, a part of you is gone. It isn’t the fact that you wouldn’t get to see them again that throbs you but the fact that, they wouldn’t be a fragment of the frame completing it with their presence is what tingles the most. The extent of involvement in their affairs or the magnitude of time spent becomes immaterial; it is that void of having to do the same set of things but without that set of people that is mortifying. And as every part of the picture would detach and precede their own path, flashbacks would follow. 

Bidding adieu in suck quick succession was maiming and tormenting, but amidst all the agony I learnt that when people leave you only think of the good they did. The pain forbids you from scrutinizing the wrongful or the adverse. It is the benevolence that you will miss and not the malice. When people leave, letting go comes automatically and effortlessly. Although the procedure is unquestionably punishing, it is assuredly not unyielding. Goodbyes make you think. They make you realize what you’ve had, what you’ve lost, and what you’ve taken for granted.”

For things, events that you find hard to deal with, the best way is to not deal with them altogether. The thought that those Grey Walls (READ GNLU) will never be the same again in all likelihood will never sink it. 

The memories however will stay for a lifetime.

“It’s time to say goodbye, but I think goodbyes are sad and I’d much rather say hello. Hello to a new adventure.”

-Ernie Harwell